Last night – I was looking for my bunni. I had a party at my
grandparents’ house out in the country and I had a few too many drinks, got in
Betty, and drove off down the country roads – determined to find my bunni. I “woke
up” in the morning of my dream world and my dad was making breakfast. He gazed
at me with tired, sad eyes and asked, “How
often do you do that? Get drunk and think she’s still here?” “I don’t have to be drunk, dad, I look for
her all the time.” I bit into one of my dad’s wonderful egg sammiches and contemplated
in my dream … remembering the desperation of peering through my headlights into
the darkness of the cornfields, hoping to see my bunni coming running toward
Betty&I.
Sometimes I wonder what my dreams mean … why I’m looking for
her … why she pops up in the middle of my sleep … what it means that sometimes
I can’t find her. Is she trying to tell me something? That she doesn’t want me
to find her? That she’s gone somewhere she can’t be found? Is she trying to
tell me to stop looking? I guess it doesn’t matter. I’ll always miss her and
love her and with I could find her again. I’ll always search for her face in
crowds and relate so many of my moments to the ones I had with her. I just hope
my next dream is one with her beside me – holding my hand – and allowing us to
be bunni&I for a night.
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