The night my baby killed herself, I made myself a red bracelet. At the time I was severely anorexic – threatened with hospitalization because “my body was eating & peeing out my muscle tissue to sustain itself.” I made myself a bracelet because I didn’t plan to stop. I loved my body for eating itself. I thanked it with a bracelet.
I had to take the bracelet off when I interned for Disney. I’d been “better” for about 6 months, so I figured it was time anyway. Though I loathed myself for my lack of discipline&self-control, I’d moved to Florida to put my life back together after losing the person I’d planned to spend it with. Unwillingly, I took the bracelet off in an attempt to continue forward.
When I moved back – I made a new one. The life I had lived was the life that I loved. A year off can’t change that. Burned onto my wrist (covering my cuts) it reminds me every day of the person I loved, the person I lost, the person I was, the person I’m finding again.
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